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Date: Aug. 09, 2003
Time: 2:22 AM
My current mood is: The current mood of fishnets666 at www.imood.com

To purge or not to purge, that is the question

There's this huge moth on the window, it's the biggest moth I've ever seen. Feeling pretty bland. I'm thinking of volunteering at the Samaritans, it's a place people call if their suicidal(incase you didn't know). I feel kinda odd since I entertain suicidal thoughts at times, but perhaps that would make me a more understanding listener? I've talked people out of suicide before (more then once unfortunatly, very tense situations). So yes, it's Friday night and I stayed home, I'm a huge geek, I know this. I binge/purged twice, I have the urge to do it again, don't know if I will. I ate a yellow squash, and now I feel anxious...not really from the calories, just the fact that it's in my stomach, I just feel like I should purge it. But I know I shouldn't. There's no reason. It's really bothering me though. Maybe I should just go to bed.

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