Date: Jan. 22, 2003 Time: 4:00 AM My current mood is: Tired and crabby I'm in an odd mood. My digestive abilities have once again diminished, not really sure why. Sunday my acid reflux started acting up, followed by more days of stomach acid trying to escape daily, as well as my stomach hurting/feeling sick/not digesting well. It's weird how it will just happen randomly, my stomach will revert back as if I've been purging or starving again and is not used to food. Hopefully it will be better tomorrow. I took Pepcid AC for the stomach acid problem, but only seems to have limited results. Damn. I swear I have a fucking ulcer or something. Tonight as I talked to Jon online, he said "Do you think of me before you go to bed at night?", and it made me want to run far, far away from him. I told him not to ask me that and to not back me into a corner. I dunno, just seemed too...leading...like I'm supposed to say yes, I can't explain I just immediatly wanted freedom. Sometimes he scares me with his emotions, they run over me and I want to hide, or push them back. He does and says the most wonderfully sweet things to me, yet I still feel anxious and...I don't know, claustraphobic? Then again I how can I if I only see him on weekends? Like the saying goes "I hate to see you go but I love to watch you leave". I'm just an unfriendly fuck. I hate my damn job. I can't take dealing with the public anymore!! Every job I've ever had has been in fast food or retail, always serving the customer. I just want to shoot everyone! Everyone just pisses me off, I can't stand waiting on half braindead people anymore. I want a nice cozy office job where I can just space out all day. I have no idea where to work though. I just can't deal with customers anymore! I could bitch about a lot of things right now, but I'm just tired and crabby. I'm so glad I have tomorrow(today) off, I've been so exhausted today. Leave a message Last Entry ~ Next Entry Enter email to occasionally get special or pointless updates: