Date: Jun. 23, 2002 Time: 10:16 PM My current mood is: Shut the fuck up!!!!! Anybody got a chainsaw? Just thought I'd ask. My dad has just asked/ordered me to do something about 4 or 5 times. In the past minute. I'm talking one minute...perhaps 2 at the most. Isn't that so INSANELY FUCKING ANNOYING THAT IT MAKES YOU WANT TO FUCKING...*deep breath* umm..ok, calmness, no shooting rampages. I just can't stand it sometimes, I need to get out of here!! I try so hard sometimes not to leave a trace of my existance, but my poreous brain forgets things. This morning my dad asked "Were you the one that had the potato chips last night?". I had binged and purged them last night. I didn't respond. Again he asked, knowing it was me, but wanting me to admit it so that he could say something rude. I said yes defeatedly, knowing he was then going to say something dumb. Then again when does he NOT say something dumb? "You left crumbs everywhere! In the computer room! The kitchen! The hallway! Blah blah blah!". Now to anyone reading this....do you REALLY think that what he described is true? Do you really think I ran through the hallway, sprinkling potatoe chips at my fancy? Spilling them all over the kitchen and computer room? I never saw one crumb to which he was refering to, I'm assuming I dropped perhaps ONE piece of a chip in the computer room, and he greedily took the chance to take some "artistic license" with reality. Anything to make me look like a fool and a pig. Just now my dad told me to shut the window of my car. I can't STAND when he tells me what to do!!!! Grrrrr. I told him not to look at my car, lol. Then he started bitching at me saying it's not mine...and me saying umm YES IT IS! Duh, who's fucking name is on the car? MINE! So fuck you. He hates it so much that I'm over 18. He used to be able to dangle things infront of me and punish me, now he has NOTHING! HA! Perhaps that's one reason he has so much resentment towards me, cause he knows he can't make me do SHIT! What's he going to ground me? Hit me? Take away some stupid privilage? Ufff I need out. Badly. I feel bad, my friends keep calling me, but I am always at work and when I'm home I don't return their calls. Or if I do, it's to tell them I'm too tired to hang out, and to cancel plans. I wish I could apologize to them, I don't mean to be rude, I just want to wither in a hole and die. Ufff....week before my period....BINGE WEEK! Great. Today not even Cute Eric could cheer me up. I walked around at work thinking how I hated everyone and wanted to fucking punch a wall. Soooooo angry today. I HATE EVERYTHING! Off to go pee then binge now. Leave a message Last Entry ~ Next Entry Enter email to occasionally get special or pointless updates: