Date: Nov. 07, 2002
Time: 8:06 PM
My current mood is:
Told my dad about dropping out (entry 2 of the day)
So I just told my dad that I want to stop school. At first he laughed and said "oh stop it", and I said "No really, I don't want to continue school". He didn't take it well. He said if I do that I'm going in the wrong direction, I'll end up like my aunt: in my 50's with no job living with her dad :( He kept saying it was the wrong thing to do and that he wants to talk to my psychiatrist about this blah blah blah. He doesn't understand that I think this is the best choice, I'm not doing well in school and taking a break(or permenent) is what I need to do. He was saying how I'll feel bad about myself cause of other people, he kept saying "you're 23 years old! People your age are already out of college making $50 thousand a year!". He thinks I'm going to live at home forever, fuck that why the hell would I want to live with him???? He said "You already had your time off from school", me:"What do you mean already had it? I can take more time off.." and then he just said how I won't be able to go back and I'll feel bad about myself cause everyone else will be so far ahead of me and I'll just be making minimum wage. How the hell does he know what will make me feel bad?? I need to move out, I can't stay here and..well obviously i want to move out cause of myself, but also cause now he thinks I'm a total loser. I can't stand living here. Why can't everyone just leave me the fuck alone? It's my life, if I wanted his opinion I'd ASK! This is the problem, I know when I tell the rest of my family I'm dropping out of school, they'll all yell at me and tell me I'm wrong and all this junk, and it's like...I don't want their opinion, it's my choice leave me alone. Obviously I have my reasons, why can't we just leave it at that? I hate how my dad always thinks his opinions are facts. School is just not the right thing for me. If you think I'm making a mistake...good for you, but I didn't ask your opinion. I hate that, how everyone has an opinion on someone else's life, and is always more then willing it jam it down your throat. I give my opinion on how other people live their life only when I'm asked, I just wish other people had the same courtisy. *sigh* I just don't know what to do. I was going to bring the drop the semeseter form in today, but didn't have the energy (see last entry), so tomorrow I definitly have to. Why can't everyone just leave me alone?? I wish I had someone to talk to, but I don't want to complain to any of my friends.
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