Date: Mar. 06, 2002 Time: 12:58 AM My current mood is: Spiraling downward I showed Julie the email from my dad's fiance Donna. The thing that upset her the most, was what I forgot to even mention in here. In the email, Donna said that she wants to use me and my sister's trust fund money! Can you believe that? I don't know what to do. I've never really even thought about my trust fund, I'm not a money type of person. But now that I am basicly being kicked out, I need that money, how am I going to survive?? I only have about $1,000 saved up in the bank. Julie had a great idea, saying I should use my trust fund to buy a condo. Yes, they are expensive, but if I can pay off the initial large amount, I will not have to pay rent(except utilities) and it will be like buying a house basicly. And if I want I can rent it out to people or live there. I have no idea how much is in my trust, so I don't know if that is a veasable plan or not. Either way, I think I'd still be able to go to school if I did that, if I get an apartment I will most likely have to drop out so that I can work to afford it. And now if my dad and Donna take it...is that legal? I have no idea how trust funds work. Julie said she thinks my dad is able to take money out cause his name may be on it. I don't know what to do. I have a feeling I'm going to get royally screwed, and I'm not going to be able to do a damn thing about it. So far altogether I have lost 4lbs, I am 109lbs now. I guess my mental health is suffering, I am losing weight again and I'm skipping classes, and not studying for tests. I keep just lying in bed, comatose to the world, or hanging out with friends and drinking. Or drinking by myself. I think for midterms I am going to fail my politics class. What am I doing, why am I failing it???? I still haven't done the midterm, it is a week late. Haven't been to that class in a week, should I even go tomorrow? The kicker is that I know if I tried I could easily get all A's in all my classes. My head just feels too cluttered and swirly to focus. I feel like I'm drowning. I wish I had a remote control and could press the pause button on life. Make everything stop in an instant, and just lie down, relax, and breath a sigh of relief. Why do I always feel like everything is always going in fast forward? Leave a message Last Entry ~ Next Entry Enter email to occasionally get special or pointless updates: