Date: 2001-04-06 Time: 4:58 p.m. My current mood is: Fasting! I'm so tired right now. Hmmm..I haven't written in here for a while, guess I've just been busy. Well, I'm glad to say that I finally got out of my binge/purge cycle, and I'm now back into restricting, yay! Infact, since Monday night I've been fasting, haven't eaten anything except today(Friday) I ate an apple. Very cool! I wasn't even going to eat the apple but my heart was pounding, as if I just ran around the rooom, except I was just sitting down doing nothing. Last night I went to a party at John's place, I didn't drink though(too many calories!), he on the other hand got plastered! lol! I got even more motivation to lose weight though. We were talking, asking each other who in music we think are hot(he thinks Britiny Spears is hot, eww!). So I asked "the Spice Girls?" and he said "No they're too fat". FAT???? Wow. If I knew how to upload pictures on this thing, I'd put on a pic of the Spice Girls, cause I just looked at some pics of them and they are in no way fat!! So now I feel really guilty for gaining weight, cause I bet I'm fatter then them. Yuck. Well right now I'm like 100lbs, so I must lose 10lbs in order to be thin. Yuck, I can't believe I let myself go like this, he must be like ewww gross. Well anyway, then I asked what about Calista Flockhart, and he started joking around saying she was fat and stuff, then joking around saying I'm obese. I think if he only knew, he would not joke about such things. I'm just glad that I've gotten my willpower back, cause I think I really could lose a bunch of weight now. I just wish I could lose it all in one day, I'm so impatient. What I'm dreading is that Passover dinner is tomorrow and on Sunday, yikes! At least the first night we're going to my uncle's, so I can just pretend I don't like any of the food. The second night is at our house though, so I think I won't be able to get away with that. I think I'll try to do what my mom used to do at holidays, she would spend the whole time getting things ready in the kitchen, removing bowls and plates, basicly she didn't really eat much. So if I do that maybe no one will notice, they'll just think I'm being so nice for doing it all myself lol. The good thing about Passover though, is that now I have an excuse to not eat, well infront of other people that is. So if I go to the school cafe with John and whoever, I can just be like oh I can't eat any of this it's not kosher, and just get a salad. Well, that's about all for today. Leave a message Last Entry ~ Next Entry Enter email to occasionally get special or pointless updates: