Date: May. 23, 2002
Time: 12:59 PM
My current mood is:
Passion
I just watched this cool movie, I don't know the name but I've seen part of it before. It was so romantic, it was about passion and romance. I know that sounds cheesy, but it made me realize that's what I want....I want a guy to fall madly in love with me. I want passion, romance. Will I ever find it? Who knows. Now I have the window open and it's so beautiful out, it seems to go along with how I'm feeling. I want to go outside and twirl around, it smells so nice out. I want someone who's like in the movies, someone who says "I'm in love with you" and...and...not like John. Not someone who's fine to just leave and never see me again, someone who will say "I can't live without you", someone who if they have to leave will say "Come away with me". That's what I don't like about John, and why even though I occasionally still harbor feelings of wanting to be with him, it's good we're not. Because he is too apathetic about me. Yes he cares about me in his own way, but I want someone with PASSION. Someone who will save me from myself. Not because I'm some flowery dependant little girl, but because I want someone who will make me see, someone who will make me want to get better, not just for them, but for me. I know I shouldn't want someone to do that for me, and I don't, but I want someone who inspires me. Aaah, the birds are singing. After I finish typing this I'm going to take a shower and get dressed, I can't bare to stay inside today! Maybe I will go for a walk today, or do some trimming in the yard. All I know is that to stay inside would be extremely lame. I'm also very happy because I'm 95lbs again, which is my lowest, meaning I know I can get under that! I hope I'm 94lbs tomorrow! Ok I'm going to go take a shower so I can go frolic outside.
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